Losing them, fixing them, forgetting to put them in
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Gary Percesepe roots shamelessly for the New York Yankees. He is the author of a short-story collection, Moratorium, and a book of poetry, Gaslight Opera. His essay in this issue is from his memoir in progress. You can find him at the big ballpark in the Bronx or at garypercesepe.com.
I learned how to be a man by modeling the behavior of my father, and then other men. What I don’t know is how my son has modeled me, and that’s creating a commotion in my heart.
I counted because I had told myself that if the count was right, my mother would be spared. My father would not die. My older sister, Jeanne, would make it to high school. But only if I kept the count.