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“i actively support pollution, as my record shows. I fervently have, time and time again, endorsed legislation that would permanently disrupt the ecological cycles by making it illegal to be a moth!”

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“i have tirelessly worked for the day when we will have a law that would extend the age at which an embryo could be aborted to twenty-one years old. i have been a lone voice in advocating a policy of mandatorily running over masses of integrated children with school buses.”

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“and so, my friends, in conclusion, i can only say to you two things. firstly, do you all know by now that my opponent is jewish? and secondly, should you fail to vote for me, imagine the dire consequences: i will commit suicide if i lose, and then my blood will be directly on your hands. thank you.
                                                                                                        thank you
                                                                                                        thank you
                                                                                                        thank you
                                                                                                        thank you
                                                                                                        thank you
                                                                                                        thank you.”

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