a bulk of averages, units of past and present, sliding on a continuum of coarse rope, cards, hard-edged, steely, shuffled in and out in towering constructions of boredom and ecstasy, a mountain, one prodigious spire, blue, crystalline, ice, melted by searing plasmic flames from the pit of the stomach, only to refreeze in a dingy corner of the mental universe, but an average nonetheless, the essence soars too high, into icy, swirling, numb clouds of gray, or plummets too far, into molten pulses of frantic earth, and the fabric is rent, cast into a womb of nothing nothing, atoms sucked in every direction into walls and skies of steel and blue, it is glimpsed from without, at odd moments, a green and purple garden, silver glimmers fan from damp broad leaves, the feel of cracked white paint on wood, a yellow bird alights, staring into the vacuum, one turns, and it is glimpsed, is felt, the vacuum, of everything, of nothing, but from within, it is seen forever, without eyes
an offhand disintegration, the slow accumulating thunder of avalanche, a sudden crash, and background becomes foreground, attention is grasped with firm soft claws, unconsciousness becomes awareness, events occur on the field of objectivity, with the tangible lucidity of dreams, sky phases from grey to black, grey to black, banks of wispy furtive clouds rush by, backing away in hushed murmurs, revealing glimpses of a stark beacon moon, the tides recede nervously, moonlight speckling the faceted waters in tones of silver and sepia, illuminating the laughter of dolphins, to turn, quickly, and perceive the momentary explosion of the landscape, a mountainside disintegrates, unbound from reality, each atom free, suspended in space for a moment, then to collapse in another expression of random existence, but it fades, fades away, into a dense golden haze of lightly swaying particles, borne on breaths of warm summer air, engrossing in its diffusion, leading the mind into soft expanses of unknown sands, only to settle away, to subside, to leave the hard kernel of absolute clarity, a perfect stillness containing all action, a perfect silence containing all sound, from horizon to horizon, a silver mirror plane, momentarily reflecting the images of deep sky blue and white vapor clouds, then infinite reflections of nothing, till objectivity loses focus, the means of sight decay, all that remains is the one eternal stare, the mental stare whose tendrils merge on misty horizons into the viscous flow of existence, all of this in a moment